How to set goals and actually achieve them

First, realise that you’re setting the wrong goals.

Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash

92% of people don’t achieve their New Year’s goals, according to a study from the University of Scranton. That’s if you even set goals too, only 3% of Americans actually setting goals, according to research done in 2016.

How can we hope to escape such statistics?

How can we be part of the elite few who actually achieve what they set out to do?

Throughout my life, I would often have this burst of motivation. I would feel so energised by an idea that I would outline big goals: I’m going to become a YouTuber, become a footballer, or even I want to go out with this girl. I would feel so invigorated by all the potential and possibility. After all, I finally had something to work towards. There were no barriers.

However, here were the key problems with my approach:

1. My goals were vague.
2. There was no plan. I improvised and reacted to what happened in my life.
3. I focused on the outcome, becoming a footballer, not the process or the identity needed to sustain the actions needed to achieve that goal.

To have any chance of achieving our goals now, we must understand the three layers of behaviour change.

The three layers of behaviour change:

1. Outcomes. Results. Typically, the big goal. What you get.
2. Habits. Routines. Practices. What you do.
3. Identity. Beliefs. The deepest layer. What you believe.

It’s like reading. We don’t always take everything literally. We have learnt in school to read between the lines, to focus on the lessons over the details. Likewise, in life we should not focus on the details (the actions of others) but the identity of those individuals, the reasons behind the actions.

Identity-based habits versus outcome habits.

To ensure long-lasting behaviour change, needed to achieve your goals, focus on changing your identity and taking on identity-based habits.

Focusing on the top layer (results) or the middle layer (habits) before addressing our identity severely affects our ability to sustain behaviour change and achieve the results we want.

This explains why attempting to replicate the lives of others is often unsuccessful; sure their morning routine or tiny daily practices may improve us slightly, but they will not sustain us towards our goals for the rest of the year, let alone the rest of our lives. “Implement the habits of Elon Musk or Steve Jobs and you’ll be successful.” Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.

You must work from the bottom up.

Start with your identity.

Say you want to be a footballer or have 100,000 subscribers on YouTube. What kind of identity would someone with those results have? Write those qualities down.

Decide who you want to be by asking the following questions:

• Who do you wish to become? A badass? A CEO? A badass CEO?
• What are the principles that I want in my life?
• What do I/we stand for?
• What are the qualities needed to sustain the habit(s) I want to implement?

“Your current behaviours are simply a reflection of your current identity” — James Clear

Habits, routines and practices.

To build and shape your identity, focus on incremental improvements and small wins that give you the evidence and motivation to continue.

We know what we want to achieve, but where do we begin? How do we break down our monumental goals and take the first step? When starting out, we will have no evidence that we are good at our craft. In fact, it is likely we are not. Therefore, we must reinforce and build our identity through our actions, habits, and routines.

You must take small actions at first, improving 1% each day. Focus on establishing the habit before building up the habit. What do I mean by this? If you haven’t read a book for the past five years, it would be foolish to expect to read for an hour straight every day. Instead, try to read a chapter a day, 3 pages before bed, for example.

With each small win, you get a rush. Each win builds up the evidence that you are becoming the type of person you have always wanted to be, have dreamt of being.

Some examples of small wins:

• Writing a paragraph → Publishing an article → Looking at your portfolio of 10 articles
• Buying a pedometer → Walking 100 steps → Working out two days in a row
• Making your bed → Decluttering your emails → Admiring your clean room
• Saving 50p a day → Making your first investment → Creating a budget spreadsheet

Though they seem small, do not underestimate the power of small wins to keep you motivated and reinforce your desired identity. It’s why the best project plans have extremely specific goals: you see your progress and that motivates you to continue. It’s why To-Do lists feel so good: each tick is a small win.

I built the habit of journalling by placing a fancy diary that I bought (small win) on my bed each morning and trying to write at least one sentence every night. I was shaky at first but as I continued; I gained confidence; I accumulated evidence that I was the type of person who wrote each night. It was unmistakable: after a few months I had essentially written my first book. What a feeling! That propelled me to create my website and then move to Medium.

This is the power of habit formation. It pushes you to new heights, to bigger goals, to a better way of life. And you feel damn good in the process.

Success, results, and achievement.

As you shape your identity through your actions, you create a chain-reaction. Your beliefs about yourself propel you to act in accordance with your identity. Such actions push you towards your goals and the results you desire.

A few years ago, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do:

• I was stuck in my head
• I pursued vague and cloudy goals
• I pursued too many goals at once
• I was inconsistent

I felt stuck.

Unfortunately, that’s life. We have all experienced this.

However, whether by luck, my own initiative or others pressing me, I found myself in ‘challenging’ situations: topless lip sync battles, volunteering, running kids’ parties as a party instructor, interrailing around Europe. Things that I may not have seen the point of in the moment ironically gave me the confidence to move just that bit higher.

Each such ‘challenge’ was a step upwards. Interrailing gave me the confidence to embark on a solo trip to Italy. Volunteering gave me the confidence and the resume to apply for jobs. In my mind, I had always wanted to leap up the steps to my goal. The truth is: it’s each of these small wins that push you to the next step.

The best thing about this is that it creates a chain reaction: the actions and small wins reinforce your identity, which in turn pushes you to act and so on. Good behaviours lead to more good behaviours, which lead to a good life and exponential results.

Summary:

The three layers of behaviour change are interlinked and are not mutually exclusive. Each layer intricately interacts with each other layer.

To ensure long-lasting behaviour change, needed to achieve your goals, focus on changing your identity and taking on identity-based habits.

To build and shape your identity, focus on incremental improvements and small wins that give you the evidence and motivation to continue. Remember to be consistent to take advantage of the Compound Effect. You will be shaky at first — it is only natural — but you must get back on track.

As you shape your identity through your actions, you create a chain reaction, a domino effect. You perform the action because that’s who I am now and the results from that action give you the evidence that needed to identify with that desired identity. You create belief in yourself that propels you to act in accordance with your identity.

Day 5/30: Article Challenge. Thanks for reading.