How do we go about finding our passion? Do we need passion?
The key lessons on finding your passion
The reasons why passion isn’t life’s most important force but is still needed
For years I asked myself, “What do I want to do? What is my passion?” I even asked the deeper question, “Who am I?”. I spent countless days, weeks, and months researching, thinking, watching advice videos on YouTube from the likes of Elon Musk and Matthew McConaughey (what a legend). I wanted to devote myself to what was meaningful: my passion. I just didn’t know what it was. And to be honest, I’m not too sure now.
The truth is: passion is not set. Nor is it singular. They or it will change over time. I know now that I love playing and watching football and tennis. I know now that I love reading and improving myself. I know now that I love the outdoors. I love exploring and spending time with friends. I know now that I love meeting new people.
I know now that I have a lot of passions, as will you, but I did not gain such knowledge from researching and agonising over the question, “What do I like?” I gained such knowledge by experimenting, going out and trying new things. I gained such knowledge by following my curiosity. It sounds so simple but oh boy did I learn it the hard way.
I gained such knowledge by experimenting, going out and trying new things.
It is when you find your passions in life, when you find your purposes and activities that you find reason to be resilient in times of adversity. You justify getting up early so you can do half an hour of writing for the novel that you are writing. You justify going to the football ground half an hour early so you can practice and improve your fitness. You love it so much that you will endure the pain that comes from pushing yourself. High performance is consistently doing the basic things right, every day. My dream is to be a high performer, particularly in the areas I am passionate about. So without further ado here are the lessons I learnt that you can apply in your life.
When just starting and figuring out your passions, remember the following:
- Passion should not be your main metric for determining what you do.
- You do not need passion to do meaningful work
- Pursue passion through action and building your ability.
To find a job you love you do not need to start with the things you love. Passion is not immediately recognisable. Rather, as you grow in competence, you become more passionate. Or to put it more simply: the more you work, the more passionate you become.
Work precedes passion, rather than the other way around
Of course, there are exceptions to this: jobs we absolutely despise, accounting jobs when we are better suited as a lecturer, for example. However, when starting out do not be guided by what is easy and what is not.
It is through completing what you set out to do that you learn whether it was worth it or not, whether the joy and satisfaction you had in the process outweighed those moments of frustration and doubt. Life is short and time is precious. That is why there must be no half-heartedness: you either do it to the best of your ability or do not bother at all. That is not to say do it perfectly, but to try your hardest. Most importantly, do not quit.
When starting out do not be guided by what is easy and what is not
Naturally, it will be difficult to code that website, to start learning French, to continue working on that novel. Nobody is born with the ability to do it with total ease. Everyone will face frustration and doubt. How much more glamorous is it to announce a humungous goal or aim? The truth is it will always require some grunt work, moments of difficulty. So endure the frustration and come out the other side. It is only then that you will know whether it was worth it.
We develop passions for what we do over time, rather than starting out with a clear, defined passion for a particular career path. It is important to note:
- Passion is not found. It is developed.
- It is challenging to pursue your passion. (It’s not always easy.)
- Passion is great, but it has its limits.
Purpose not passion
One of the most important lessons I have learnt about passion is that it will not always be sufficient to motivate you to achieve your goals. Therefore, I ignore misleading quotes like “follow your passion and you will never have to work a day in your life”.
Such quotes suggest work should not be so difficult, so draining, so dull. When it is, you need to decide whether the pain, when working out or coding that start-up, is worth the effort. Frustration will come regardless of what you do in life but if you want to achieve what you set out to do, you must endure.
And this is where purpose comes in.
When working to achieve your goals, passion may keep you going in most times of frustration and adversity. But not always. Passion was insufficient for Stephen King to continue after getting rejected by 30 publishers: King threw his manuscript in the bin. It was his wife who picked it out and encouraged him to continue. When I was seeking my passions, I gave up or quit when it got tough. I uninstalled Duolingo or half-heartedly worked on Codeacademy, etc. But regardless of my failures, and there are a lot of them, I sought new things out and tried them.
So when finding your passion, you must also work on your resilience. You must build up your discipline. To really learn we must embrace new scenarios, commit to new crafts. After all, as Robert Allen said, ‘there is no failure, only feedback’ and as you experiment, you will learn. Famous and world-class photographers like Man Ray continued with photography not because they loved aperture, shutter speed or depth of field but because they developed their ability through trial and error. They continued through hardship, pain, frustration, and found joy and immense satisfaction through their work. So pursue what leaves you greatly satisfied but overcome the obstacles that will come your way.
At dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: “I have to go to work — as a human being. What do I have to complain of, if I’m going to do what I was born for — the things I was brought into the world to do? Or is this what I was created for? To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?” — Marcus Aurelius
How to apply this in your life
Do not wait to find your passion. Having passion as your main drive when you are just starting out will keep you confused and unhappy. As the German poet Goethe said, we can only ever gain self-knowledge “never by thinking, but by doing”. It is in the living, the hustle, the working, that we live a fulfilling life, that we can be satisfied.
So what can we do?
- Find new challenges, work, activities and groups relating to areas of life that interest us. Of course, these need not be new things but areas that we previously dismissed, on account of laziness, lack of motivation, or perhaps being preoccupied with other activities. Or these could be areas we are working on currently but need to re-approach in light of our new understanding of passion.
- Commit to the task at hand. See it through.
- Be resilient in the face of adversity. Passion can provide that but when finding our passions we must develop discipline, resilience, and mental toughness.
- Develop your ability in your job or craft.
- Focus on purpose and creating work that satisfies you, helps others, or is useful.
Ending thoughts
You can do this. The fact that you are reading this demonstrates that you have taken the first step in finding your passions. Now before you get out there and experiment, here is the ultimate lesson:
It is resilience in face of adversity coupled with passion that will keep us motivated, alongside reflection when or if our passions wane and we begin to love new crafts. Follow your curiosity.
It is about the process. You build passion. You gain momentum. You get struck down but that’s when you get back up. Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up. You gingerly take that first step and then the second, and then suddenly you’re beginning to jog, stumbling a little. Shrieking pain when your left foot hits the ground, sending waves of discomfort throughout your body, but you keep on going. You don’t know why but you do. And suddenly, you’re taking it in your stride, literally. Your head is still pounding and your heart thumping, but you’ve set your goal, you’re moving forward. You’re not planning, you’re not drafting letters, you’re not at the drawing board. You’re not in mere motion. You’re acting and even though everyone, even yourself, is telling you that you are illogical, or that you have done enough work for the day, you are on your path, and you’re moving forward.
